The Truth Behind My Teacher Voice
At my college’s education department graduation ceremony, I heard a peculiar speech. I don’t even remember who the speaker was, but one word she said stuck with me even five years later.
Intruder.
As educators, it is very easy to feel that we are inadequate at our jobs. In the movies we see Robin Williams inspiring all of his students by walking on desks. We see Morgan Freeman drastically improving test scores amongst an entire failing school. We see Hillary Swank work two jobs and destroy her marriage because of the time and money she spends giving everything she has to her students.
There’s this secret (or not so secret) idea that you are only a good teacher if you are staying until 7pm prepping every day. If your classroom doesn’t look like a rainforest-come-to-life or a glittertastic-rock-star-paradise, you aren’t a good teacher. If you buy things from Teachers Pay Teachers, you aren’t a good teacher because you can’t create something that visually appealing by yourself. Expectations.
Eventually, somebody will find out that I am an intruder. I don’t belong in this world of fabulous teachers.
I felt it as a first-year teacher. Every day, I was so drained from seeing hundreds of kids that I didn’t want to stay past 5, much less 7! I got the flu three times in my first year of teaching, and I didn’t know what to have a sub do in music class. From Day 1, I felt like an intruder.
Five years later, I still don’t feel that I am a great educator. I know that I can do some things well, but I know there are so many people who are better than me at teaching. On the worst days, I still feel like an intruder.
Why do we have to feel this way?
Literally, we are all working at jobs that don’t pay that much (unless you’re in China…), spending all day with 30+ kids, trying to help them learn. Sometimes we must act in the role of our students’ parents, because perhaps their parents are never around, or perhaps we’re at a boarding school where we see the kids more than their parents do. Yet, the expectation to “do more” is always there.
So, why not get it out in the open? Why not be honest with one another where we feel we are weak in our classrooms and help each other? If we are constantly open and honest with one another, if we are willing to accept advice from others and let people visit our not-so-perfect classrooms, maybe we will feel better. The truth is, the really great teachers are the ones who don’t feel that their teaching is good enough because they are striving to be better. Just the fact that we want to be better, more effective teachers makes us “good teachers”. Good teachers are learners.
According to George Couros, author of The Innovator’s Mindset:
“Innovation (and enjoyment) flourishes when teachers collaborate to learn and practice new strategies. Isolation is often the enemy of innovation.”
Educators, especially you who feel inadequate, let’s take a step today to grow. Ask a trusted colleague to come watch your class and give you some positive feedback as well as some tips. Watch a “great” teacher’s class. What tiny little thing can you take from that to put in your classroom? Let’s not stay in the place of feeling inadequate, but instead, share that with somebody and then grow from it.
